I miss me

I sometimes feel like a stranger to myself. Things have changed, and I have changed without knowing it. Even now knowing that I am not totally myself anymore as I used to, I just don't know what it was that I lost or changed. Is it for good that I changed? Maybe. I am not certain of things anymore, even of things that I want now. I cannot also sort things now the way I used to. And so a friend of mine asked me, "what it feels like to be 30?" First word that came in my head and which I said to her was, "Resigned, not pressured simply resigned."

I have a very close friend, Mr. F, who is capable of self healing FAST. When I say fast it is indeed fast. Which I find really special of him. He told me that I am living in the past. I will not say he is wrong because he could be right. I didn't say this to him but I don't feel that way honestly. Actually, I could anytime re-live the past if I'd want to but I didn't because I believe that doing so my dreams has a better chance in the future. However I cannot oppose nature, past affects the present. No matter how this brain realizes the potential impact in my future of letting my present be affected by the past, still it happens. It is just TIRING to actually try escape or neglect the effects of the past. SOMETHING'S LOST IN ME.

Maybe God and time is just all I need. Unlike Mr. F who has the ability to get better at will, as for me I need TIME. I've been praying to God to restore me, fill me. It's been a while... I miss myself.

DTC Family Camp!

This year's Family Camp is ambitious. Grabeh, this is truly a BIG leap of faith to do. Sa Baguio gaganapin ang camp and with all the financial challenges that everybody is facing, it's really hard to tell the numbers of those who can come. While our target is 100, those who registered to come (not yet paid!) is up to 80 pa lang.

Anyways, the picture is the chosen image for our camp and will be printed in a large tarpouline. The picture surely depicts our camp's theme which is T.A.W.A.G - Time Alone With Almighty God.

Model pa dito si Anna. Surely the picture showered me with comments and teasing from my church friends.

Know God to know love

Just reposting a quote I saw from a church mate..

I truly believe in my heart that this is so true...

Anytime we allow someone to displace GOD as the focus of our affection,& instead of making GOD the object of our longing, we wrongly direct these feelings toward another human. We became IDOLATERS, hoping that this person will meet our needs and bring us fulfillment. You'll never know WHAT LOVE is until you know WHO GOD is.


And so I pray everyday that I may be able to stay my affection to the one true God. He is the only one who can fill me really.. I have ever experienced it over and over. Whoever he is that God will give to me as a partner, I truly believe that he is someone of the same faith as mine. The one who will not let my affection to my God be displaced. :)

What's the picture for? Wala. I thought it would look cute on my blog hehehe. This was by the way taken in Batanes :)

Factory Tour and the Huge Eye Glass

Eventhough it's freezing cold here I wouldn't pass this buy 1 take 1 treat.  Only at 2$!

My first laptop! Yessss!

Need I say more?  I am just excited when I got this!  

My US birthday celebration is just sumptuous and AWESOME!

Today is my last day and my boss is very kind enough to push our Factory tour here at Dell-Austin. Its more of an opportunity to see how those programs we've been working so hard to code is being used in the manufacturing factory.

Just like any other manufacturing factories, they have procedures to follow as part of their security process and so we encountered some problems at first getting inside the building but it could be because we don't look like a threat to their security so they let us in. We were given this eyeglass to wear all the time we're inside the factory. It was a clear and big eyeglass and when I wore it the lens is sticking to my eye lids. I figured that maybe the eyeglass is made for the Americans, you know with the deep-set eyes and the nose that are straight unlike most asians that are small and flat (and cute!!) My eyes are not deep set, its more of the opposite. Its protruding and prominent in my face, and my nose are small (pero di po ako pango -just small!) So during the factory tour I would have to hold the eyeglass so as it will not stick to my eyelids, besides it feels a little bit stupid for the eyeglass leaning on my lids then on my cheek. hehhe

Zsa Zsa Zatrunah - Best play ever!

A day before I flew to US, Anna and I watch ZsaZsa Zaturnah Ze Musical. Prior to seeing that show we already heard how great it was and actually Anna had been waiting for that play for over a year so you can probably imagine how excited we were that day. 

First surprise was that the room was around 60sqm only - unlike that Peter Pan show that we watched - 'twas very small and we're just one sit away from the stage. Because we're so close, my thoughts were on what we will see when Eula Valdez is on her 2 piece Zaturnah costume.. can you imagine?!? LOLZ!

And so the show started. It was hilarious, terrific.. I always had a good time watching stage plays way back college days but this one tops it all. All that time its either you're smiling broadly or want to go ROTFL. Super nakakatawa, no wonder this play is notorious. To say that it was fantastic is an understatement. We simply had a good time. Another reason why I enjoyed it is because I saw Anna enjoying it all the time too. 

I'd say that day was perfect. A perfect moment to cherish while I'm away with the people I care about in my homeplace. :)

Tabo! (US Experience)

 Isa sa bagay na hindi ko matanggap dito sa US ay ung paggamit ng tissue paper para panglinis ng pwet mo after jumebs. My golly marami silang tubig pero wala silang tabo! I was here in the office enjoying my coffee when I feel that urge to take may bowel. I have no intention of delaying it, so I went stright to the CR.



Forgive me for describing this but my dirt was something that you would want water to clean up your ass with, you know it is moist-y and soft-y hehehe. Yucky!! I just use tissue paper (they got loads of them) to wipe 'em out. No Water! Kadiri noh. I'm not used to that siempre pinoy style ako eh. It reminds me of my childhood sa probinsya. At that time, water is about a kilometer away so sa bahay ng lola ko so every drop counts. To save water, kapag nagjebs ka - we do it by squatting on a whole between two coconut logs on top of a pit - we use the coconut husks (bunot) to wipe our asses (OUCH! but its true!). Imagine my beautiful butt! LOL! 


Photos: Taken at Austin, Texas.

But come to think of it, we pinoys prefer to clean our dirt with water and our BARE HANDS, than clean it with dry toilet paper. Ironic noh?!?

A sleepy blog.

I had so many adventures this week, being my first time in US. I am here at Austin, Texas and its almost 1am here. Why am I still up? because I'm so desperate to produce an entry here. Can't believe that I've been neglecting my blog now. Hmmm di pde yun. 


So its so cold here. Like super nakakapanginig na kalamigan over here. It hurts my nose and it dries my skin. I wanted to tell you so many things buy I am really antok.


Fill you in tom okay.